Hey it's October, and that means it's time once again for a month long celebration of Halloween and other spooky stuff.
If you know this blog, you know not to expect a new post every day like some of my fellow bloggers are doing for Halloween. I'll have a couple of new posts each week. Frankly I'm not even sure what I'm really doing yet, but that isn't anything new.
So to kick things off here's a few pictures of my first ever attempt at Halloween decorations. It might be surprising, but the last year I went out trick-or-treating was in the 4th grade. The next year I thought it would be more fun to set up a haunted display on the front porch to hand out candy to the trick-or-treaters.
One dummy siting next to a fake fence...
... another dummy on the porch..
...and a kid in an alien mask pretending to drink a dry ice infused drink.
It's a little sloppy, but it's completely kid made. Over the years I got a lot better with my homemade props and other decorations.
Labor Day just isn't the same without the Jerry Lewis Muscular Dystrophy Telethon. Although for a kid whose first day of school started the day after Labor Day it was the most miserable day of the year. It's funny how even misery can have a certain nostalgia now...
Heck, I think I'm nostalgic for those old Hickory Farms mall stores too.
Anyway a slogan used on the Jerry Lewis Muscular Dystrophy Telethon was "Stay Up and Watch the Stars Come Out." So before September slips away, and discussing Labor Day and old telethons becomes horribly belated, here's my take on "Stay Up and Watch the Stars Come Out" with this star-studded collection of 1970's magazine ads.
Look it's Buddy Ebsen for Soft Parkay Margarine. I think this ad is subtly attempting to invoke the country charm of The Beverly Hillbillies in which Ebsen stared. All that's missing is a dopey young guy siting at the table to stand-in for Jethro.
Up next is Barbara Feldon for Rockwell International calculators. This little checkbook & credit card holder \ calculator thingy went for $45 back in 1976. Adjusted for inflation that's $182.20 in 2012 dollars - and I don't think it's real leather either. Well I guess it seems like something Agent 99 might need.
Here's Connie Stevens for ACE Hardware surrounded by Ortho brand pesticides. The internet tells me Connie was the first to sing ACE's "Helpful Hardware Man" jingle. Only a few years after this ad was printed, Suzanne Somers would be singing the jingle on TV.
Richard Deacon for Thermatronic microwave ranges. Under Richard's pic it reads, "Richard Deacon star of his own cook show, 'Deacon Does It In the Kitchen.'" Richard Deacon is well-know for his classic sitcoms roles on Leave It To Beaver and The Dick Van Dyke Show, but I can't find anything on the internets about 'Deacon Does It In the Kitchen.' It's a show I'd love to see. However, I did find a microwave cook book he authored.
Duke Ellington for Hammond Piper organ. Duke was about 74 years old when this ad was made. The pose is kinda juvenile, but it's nice to know Duke was so spry in his latter years.
Elke Sommer for Kellogg's Special K. Elke was everywhere in the 60's and 70's. For example she stared in Mario Bava's Baron Blood (1972) which I've embedded below in its entirety for your enjoyment...
Here's George Burns for Tabby cat food. This ad is from 1976 when a 10¢ coupon was still a good deal.
Next is the sensational Joey Heatherton for Serta Perfect Sleeper mattress. Even though she's dressed rather conservatively I thought Joey projects quite a bit of sexiness in this ad. If you don't see it, check out this Serta Perfect Sleeper TV commercial and see if it changes your mind...
Sandy Duncan for Alive Support Pantyhose by Hanes. This ad is proof that having a glass eye in no way impairs your ability to high kick. So can we please put that old wives' tale to rest? It's 2012 fer crying out loud people.
Shirley Jones for Sunbeam. This is the only ad in this post that uses a word balloon. Although this unique word balloon has a curvy pink edge that you'd find on a thought balloon. So is Shirley speaking to us, or sending us a telepathic message?
The renowned Peter Ustinov for Chenin Blanc from Ernest and Julio Gallo. Peter says, "It may be one of the finest wines you've ever tasted." I believe him. He's a very erudite man that surely knows his wines. Unfortunately it seems "E&J" no longer produces a Chenin Blanc.
Last, but certainly not least here's Charlotte Rae for Mr. Muscle overnight oven cleaner. Well Charlotte is playing a character in this ad, so it's not an endorsement like the ads above. She's doing a great acting job in this ad, and especially in the TV commercial...
From 1953 it's Happy Journey Preparing Your Child for School a handbook for parents whose child will soon enter kindergarten or first grade.
It's a 32 page booklet published by the Department of Elementary School Principals, National School Public Relations Association, and National Congress of Parents and Teachers. I'm not going to scan all 32 pages, but here's a few I think are good.
School is your child's job...
School is a place to try, to practice... to be a pirate
School is a place to practice good health habits... My favorite is "use the bathroom regularly, independently in a sanitary manner." Important words to live by.
This booklet was originally 40¢ back in the day, but I've seen it available online for anywhere from $7 to $22.95. My booklet is in excellent condition so if you're looking for a copy don't hesitate to make an offer.
Whoa, the month almost went by without a post, and if that happened the world might have just slipped off its axis.
So to prevent a possible Mayan calendar prophecy, and for the betterment of all mankind I proudly present a look a couple of forgotten early 70's ad women...
Fist here's Vivian Vance as Maxine the coffee lady. Vivian is well-known for playing Lucille Ball's sidekick, but I don't think many remember her time as a pitch-woman for Maxwell House Instant Coffee...
These print ads are kinda like story storyboards for a commercial, and she did those too...
This next forgotten lady is named Rosie, and she wants you to know Clorox does more than the wash...
Whoever Rosie was I don't believe she ever got to do Clorox commercials, but nevertheless I've regularly poured Clorox in my toilets. Yeah, that last sentence was a total non sequitur, but letting Clorox sit over night in your toilet is great way to get them sparking clean without the chore of scrubbing. I think that was another non sequitur also.
Last month was my Kings Island 40th anniversary palooza, and here's something that I never got around to posting until now - it's a Kings Island postcards book from the late 1970's...
Here's a great closeup of the Turnpike Ride above...
It looks to me like you needed to show your AARP card in order to drive. Sorry Junior I know this looks like a kiddie ride, but you're gonna have to let Grandma drive.
Let's celebrate Independence Day by visiting Mammoth Cave Wax Museum in Cave City, KY. It's appropriate since you can see the cover of this early 80's brochure proclaims "AMERICA'S HERITAGE EXCITINGLY ALIVE." Albeit it's "EXCITINGLY ALIVE" as much as wax can be...
This next page folds out to show you many of the American historical figures and early movie stars on display. There's even Jesus too for good measure.
While you're at the Mammoth Cave Wax Museum be sure to check out the Huckleberry Hill Craft Village next door - they even have a 17 foot great white shark. It's fake, but it's still big and scary.
If you were thinking about visiting you can stop looking at that map above. Mammoth Cave Wax Museum closed it's doors last year, and it's contents were auctioned off a few months ago.
For fun I looked up the auction house, and learned how much some of the figures went for:
Charlie Chaplin - $25,000.00 (highest price for a wax figure)
Jean Harlow - $16,000.00
Rudolph Valentino - no price listed
Jesus went for only $1,000.00. That's very affordable to have your own personal Jesus. A little Depeche Mode humor for you (very little).
Still more Kings Island. It's been a month-long event here, and now it's time for the 1976 brochure...
The above page has a lot of cool stuff, for example, look at that shot of the Kenton's Cove Keelboat Canal...
I don't know about you, but that looks like a 100 foot drop, or at least that's what it looked like to me when I was a kid. Shockingly, my mother rode this with the rest of the family, and she was one to shy away from them thrill rides
Next, and to the best of my knowledge it's the only picture on the ultra-nets from this Kings Island show in existence. It's a picture of the marionettes from the Krofft Puppet Theater...
FUN FACT: The Krofft Puppet Theater was in an inflatable red building. (Can it truly be called a "building" if it's inflatable?) You can see this building in the first couple of seconds of this Partridge Family music video. EXTRA FUN FACT: I only recently learned that the Brady's weren't the only 70's TV family to visit Kings Island...
Back to the Krofft Puppet Theater... I don't remember much about the show. Basically the only thing I vaguely remember was a Frankenstein Monster skit. If I remember correctly, it was a black-light segment with the monster's table/slab on the right side of the stage. A jaunty tune played as a row of disembodied hands past the parts of the creature from the left side of the stage down to the table. Once assembled the creature rose from the slab and walked into the audience. That was a neat trick. I was slightly alarmed that Frankenstein was walking into audience, but to my relief he didn't come near me.
